In Remembrance of Dad

Stephen Wayne Stewart born on June 22, 1950. Deceased on August 13, 2009

Steve was my dad...

When I was little, I believed he could walk on water. He was the biggest, strongest, and smartest. We shared many fun times together, including hunting, fishing, and camping. We had a family spot on Louis River and he even carved our last name into the picnic table and said that "marked our spot." He said no one else was allowed to camp there. I believed him, although I now know that wasn't true.

Within the past two months, my dad and I shared a laugh about several fishing and hunting stories. We talked about the "flicker" he shot by mistake, thinking it was a grouse. I never did let him live that one down. I still harassed him about that, 20 years later. We also recently shared a laugh about a fishing trip we went on when I was little. I was reeling in the fish and said, "Come on you bastard!" Can't imagine who I would have learned such a word from. HAHA!

I was able to reminisce with my dad about the past, probably more so than most daughters can do, that was what we had! I know that he loved the outdoors and as children, we spent a lot of time there. I can recall one time going hunting with him in the field across from "Disappearing Lake," sitting in an old homestead, watching the deer in the field. No gun, we weren't hunting he said. We were just watching how amazing they were. He told me to stay so quiet so I could see them. I moved and they spotted us and he told me to watch their ears and how still they would stand. It was a memory I am glad I have. I was lucky enough to see that side of my dad, not everyone was able to share that side of him. He had many sides to him, that being the best!

My dad and I reconnected about five years ago after many years of phone calls only. It was a difficult relationship at times, but I am grateful for those years. He was able to be part of my adult life and meet two of my three children and I was able to get to know my dad, for the person he was and not the image I had of him as a child.

I know that he made choices in his life that he regretted until the day he passed from this life, but one thing I always knew, whether he showed it or now, was that he loved me. He cared about me and the life that I lived. He loved my kids and wanted to be part of our lives, he just allowed things to get in the way sometimes.

He had many loves, one of them was food. When he would come to visit I would always get a request list of food and I remember that he loved pepper. He would have saved himself the time if he had just uncapped the bottle and poured it on rather than sprinkle it. He told me the last time he was here that I was a great cook and that I must have inherited it from my mother, I think he was right. He would always brag about how wonderful her spaghetti was, but he said my Shredded Beef enchiladas were better, little did he know it was her recipe. I guess he knows now.

I am saddened for the loss of our family, even though I didn't get to see him often, the absence is still felt. I sent my dad a letter last week, filling him in on the current happenings in our family and asking how he was doing. I sent it Saturday, along with pictures. He passed away Thursday night of a heart attack. There are two things I pray for, one, that he went quickly and peacefully (hopefully in his sleep), the other, that he got my letter and knew how much I truly loved him! He had his faults but he was still my dad and he meant a lot to me.

To my dad~ Rest peacefully dad! I will forever love you and the "super hero" image you carried in my heart. I will miss you and our conversations, I will always cherish our years together. You will always and forever carry a very special place in my memories and my life. I will be there to help lay you to rest next week, you won't have to do it alone.

I love you!

Your daughter,

Jessica